Overcoming pornography and masturbation consists of 4 main things: Understanding your true self-worth, removing porn as an option in your life, making new habits and staying productive, and accountability with loved ones. If you find that you’re not able to follow these steps, you won’t succeed. Motivation is often the greatest challenge – how badly do you want a new life?
Understanding your true self-worth
Overcoming addiction means overcoming your fears of not being good enough or life not being good enough. This comes as you understand your own self-worth. Since you don’t know who you are until you know whose you are, this requires an intimate relationship with your Higher Power. He is the one who determines your worth and meets all of your emotional needs, not your spouse or anyone else. This is accomplished through prayer, meditation, study and gratitude.
Removing porn and masturbation as an option
You will only be able to go long periods of time without porn when watching porn and masturbation are no longer options in your life. Those who have this mindset live as if porn didn't exist. You have to be OK with the idea that you will never watch porn again in your life. Ever. Having a journal (accountability) is absolutely crucial as you track your emotions, thoughts, and observations.
Making new habits and staying productive
To break a habit you need to make a habit. Overcoming porn is much deeper than simply quitting certain behavior; it’s about creating a new life. You have to live life on purpose, which means becoming passionate about good things and being engaged in healthy activities. This includes all areas of your life – physical, emotional, spiritual and intellectual. You must learn to embrace discomfort and pain with the goal of learning from it. Meditation, relationships, service, and other activities are essential. You must be up and about! By doing this, your weakness becomes your strength and this problem becomes the pathway to a healthier, more compassionate, more understanding life. It will transform you into something higher and better than you could have been without it.
Accountability with loved ones
You need support to get through this and learn what you need to learn. It is fear that says you can do it on your own because you don't want to have to rely or be vulnerable with others. It takes courage that many can't find to truly recover, but love demands the effort. Maintain daily trust discussions about your thoughts and feelings and challenges. And remain completely honest, with faith and confidence that your self-worth is set and unchangeable and you’re safe - you have a place and you will always belong.
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